Welcome

Welcome!  Whatever road you took, I am happy you found your way here.  I hope you will look around.  Above all, I hope you find material that will be useful to you.

What do I mean by extreme healing?

Two unusual sets of circumstances made an impact on my life.

The first one might be called extreme wounding.

We are all wounded — wounded in our soul, in our ability to trust, to love and receive love, to express our potential.  This wounding can be lighter or deeper, but it is not optional — it is a mark of our humanity.

There is a scale, a spectrum of injuries, traumas, and losses, from the frustration of not finding your keys to serious stuff — grief, terror, agony, chaos, helplessness, loss of consciousness, and so on.  What happened to me is at the very tip of that scale.  (I may, later on, justify that claim and write a page with details on the events and my investigation of them.)

The other oddity is luck, good fortune so unlikely that it remains bewildering to me, many years later.  More one-in-a-billion than one-in-a-million chance.  When I was heading towards oblivion fast, I received extraordinary help which changed the direction of my life.  I survived and learned to thrive.

Perhaps it was design.  I am still living in that question.

Being by nature curious and inquisitive, I have tried literally hundreds of ways to help myself.  When some practice helped a lot, I of course remembered it.  When two practices helped a lot, I asked myself: what if I did both together?  Often, there was an excellent synergy between them.  Eventually, a short list of ways to deal with the heavy stuff of our lives began to emerge.

Hence this site.

That short list is sturdy and reliable.  It was thoroughly tested.  You will find very little ideology here.  Sometimes I talk theory, but only when it is necessary in order to understand how and why something works.  I don’t have a fixed view of The Way Things Really Are to defend.  You can have and keep any belief system and still use the information you find here.  If I recommend an approach, it is only because it has worked in a very difficult case — mine.

In what is the heavy stuff?, I try to clarify this intentionally vague phrase.  Out of that search for a definition, one thing became clear: whether you have been labeled schizophrenic or successful, if you are here reading these words, there may be some useful information for you.

This doesn’t mean that I have ‘got it together’ or that I am ‘healed.’  This work continues and will continue indefinitely.  The word healing is used here as a way of living, a literal lifestyle, more than an event with a ‘before’ and an ‘after.’

I feel qualified to share this information as an advice-giver because the enormity of the inner material I have been working on provided me with a quality education, not because the work is in any sense finished.  The very idea of getting done with it might not have any sense.  A more expansive point of view is required (please see the systemic view).  A more mature understanding of this process is embodied in the archetype of the wounded healer.

Because I strive to make the information usable by adherents of any system, it often comes out as general principles.  This does not mean they are impractical or intellectual products.

That list is eclectic and open-ended.  I am always interested in learning something new.  If I don’t mention something that has helped you a lot, it could be that you and I are different, or it could be that I don’t know it.  It that case, please tell me about it.  Nothing here is meant to invalidate anything else.

This is just an attempt to outline the principles that emerged when the stuff got really thick and sticky and I kept going anyway.

If I do not talk about God, it is by choice, in order to avoid turning some readers off.  The truth is that, as we approach the heavy stuff we’ve been carrying, it becomes necessary to perform acts of faith and call upon greater powers than our habitual sense of self.  So much misdirection and confusion have been accumulated on this subject over the centuries that I find it easier to describe the specifics of this work in secular language.  Those who have been in the trenches will easily translate it into their familiar spiritual systems.

In writing these pages, I tried not only to stick to the essential, but to mention all of the essentials, in the event that someone actually decides to use this information.  Every day, probably hundreds of people create websites in which they reinvent the wheel about healing.  I did my best to avoid being one of them.

A drawback of this writing approach is that it doesn’t have a nice, easy flow to it.  What you are reading is a skeleton outline of what could easily fill several times the space.  Eventually, it will be a book.  If you choose to actually work with the information, it might be preferable to read just a little at a time.  A more elaborate site with an organic, non-linear presentation is in the works.

At the heart of this list is work with entheogenic substances, also known as psychedelics.  Quite simply, without them, I wouldn’t be here writing to you.  I deplore their criminalization.  They are powerful, often miraculous medicines.  Every day, I work for the evolution of their perception in our society.  However, you will not find much policy debate or social controversy here.  The focus is on healing work only.  Whenever I mention them, a respectful, dignified and professional attitude is assumed.

In entheogens and personal transformation, I try to outline a teachable method combining them with individual psychotherapy, systemic therapy, meditation, physical purification, karma yoga, conscious sexuality and other approaches I have found to have a powerful synergy with them.  The end product of the method is an ability to work with our most intractable limitations, which I try to define here.

Nothing in this site should be misconstrued as an encouragement to break any law of any country.

Nothing in this site is about medical or psychiatric healing.  I am not engaged in the treatment of any kind of disease.  Readers who are seeking treatment for a disease should contact a licensed professional.

Furthermore, the information presented here was not acquired through the scientific method.  It is based on deep intuition, on an experiential approach to healing and on my life lessons.  While I endeavor to respect all laws and regulations about illnesses and their cure, I affirm the seniority of spiritual healing over all materialistic approaches.

Comments are welcome, even whole conversations, but they must stay on-topic.  Irrelevant comments will not go online.

It is not possible to mention all those who have had a part in making this possible.  I thank my parents, the one who saved my life and my daughter for their unique contributions.

This site is dedicated to my brothers and sisters on the path of conscious evolution.

Again, welcome!  I hope you enjoy your visit.

PS  After having nearly completed the writing of these pages, it strikes me that they are about advanced work.  I can see many ways in which they wouldn’t make much sense to an accidental reader.  If the general idea of extreme healing resonates with you, do read on.  Otherwise please feel free to skip this site.

© contrast10 2014.  All rights reserved.

5 thoughts on “Welcome

  1. Ah love love this…. I think most healers are wounded in some way. However events the last 5 yrs of my life, have made it difficult for me to work. Normally I worked with homeless and never had a problem transforming the energy back, and healing others healed me.

    The last 5 years have been so tough, trauma on a level that I didn’t know existed. I had no idea that could happen to the brain. Then trauma upon trauma, while traumatised lol. Actually it isn’t really a lolling matter…. I feel bad. I have a website that has 2.5 million hits, and readers who wait for my next post, but I feel too sad, and frozen. Sometimes it is hard to lift up others when you feel wounded yourself. I try positive thinking….. but have such a heavy sigh in my soul

    Nikki x

    • Hi Nikki, and thank you for your comment. I am sending you light and warmth to unfreeze you from this difficult passage.

      I took a look at your blog, Dating a Sociopath, and I have one comment. Couldn’t read everything, so I am sorry if it is already covered somewhere in it.

      I think there have been times in my life when I fit the definition of a sociopath. I don’t now, but many people cope with extreme trauma through an inability to feel. You can be assured that all sociopaths, in your life or not, are people who have been seriously hurt at some point. As they say in AA, hurt people hurt people. This blog has specific suggestions for dealing with the inability to feel. I believe empathy can be built up just like some muscles get built up at the gym. You can check out the page on the willingness to feel, which has specific recommended exercises.

      In summary, I don’t like dividing humanity into the ‘good’ and the ‘bad.’ We are all on a continuum and we all contain light and darkness. There could be much more to that conversation, but I’ll stop here.

      Regarding positive thinking, there is something that could be useful to you on that same page. Many people have noticed that positive thinking does not work. That is because it attempts to ‘push away’ the negativity that we all carry instead of opening the heart to it for transformation and integration. The two-colunm technique for affirmations that I describe resolves that problem. It can help you develop the skill of interacting with the negative instead of keeping it locked up. Keeping it locked up guarantees that it will be there forever, and sooner or later it will rise again to bite you. We have to be bigger than our negativity and that is done by opening ourselves, not closing ourselves.

      I hope you find some value in this.

  2. Hi thanks, YES!! I have written about this too. There is a psychiatrist, that has undertaken study to show that psychopathy was related to previous trauma.

    When I met the last one, I was in trauma. Incredibly so. I watched the patterns repeat, it was like a PTSD trigger. When I wrote about this, there was of course, outrage, as sociopaths deliberately dupe, manipulate and con to get what they want. They also, deliberately ruin other peoples lives.

    I thought about my own experiences (I had no concept of the outside world for 3 years no emotional connection for 4 years), so with the last person in my life, I could absolutely see the similarities, in terms of triggers and reactions – and the causes of this – but not the DELIBERATE acts to dupe and con others for own personal gain.

    I do believe that there is more to it. I returned to him, for a year, which caused outrage on my blog, I had to close for 2 months, and have never really recovered from it. Why did I close ‘well he needed me to tell people the truth’….. as soon as I did, and it wrecked (again) all that I had spent a year building, his behaviour patterns began to repeat again.

    They actually enjoy hurting others, and enjoy duping, conning, winning, and getting one over on other people. I don’t think that is my experience of trauma and what happened within my brain. But we are all different.

    I don’t do judgement, I just wrote what I saw. I have one rule on my site ‘no personal attacks’ either way. That kind of works, Both sociopaths and victims post.

    After what happened to me, I know that ‘labels’ are not useful. But it can help a victim considerably to understand what the hell has just happened to their life that has now been burned to the ground.

  3. The majority of my blog, was written with a traumatised brain. You see, I didn’t have the emotional connection either. So, he couldn’t manipulate my emotions. I therefore observed…..without emotion, more fascination.

    As I was so traumatised, and had no emotional connection, additionally, I was living in the ‘right now’ tomorrow was just a white space. So, the next time that there was drama, (usually next day) it was forgotten. I think that sociopaths do that too. They just forget and move on.

    That is why we got on so well for so long, only I was traumatised, and vulnerable, he was deliberately conning, for his own gain, manipulating and deceiving me. I wasn’t doing that to him.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s